Have you ever shared with someone how someone else has hurt you deeply? You took that step to confide and share your deepest hurts….only to have that confidant come back to you and tell you how wonderful they thought that person was.
When you decided to share your “pain,” your intent wasn’t to make that person hate the “wounder,” but you were hoping for someone to come alongside you to help you “shoulder the pain” of the wrong. To give understanding to a situation that they may not have seen or been personally involved in. You thought they knew you well and would help you walk through the pain, but instead…”salt got poured on the wound.” Proverbs 25:20, “Like one who takes away a garment on a cold day, or like vinegar poured on a wound, is one who sings songs to a heavy heart.”
At 54 I continue to learn that unless someone walks in your shoes they cannot possibly know or understand your walk. Many think that if they do not see it or experience it for themselves, then it must not have happened.
I have a dear friend who was sexually molested by her own father for years. He was a pillar in their church. Humble. Kind. Generous. Loved by all. NO ONE WOULD HAVE SUSPECTED the ABUSE.
People like him I have learned to call “charmers.” But behind closed doors…he was a monster to his own daughter. I will never forget, through hours of tears, her sharing with me about the times she attempted to share her pain, her wounds with her own mother who refused to believe her and chose to defend her husband. She then went to her sister who believed her but said, “You should have done something….He is still our dad. He never did it to me so I don’t have a problem with him. It is your problem….”
I am reminded of the passage in Ephesians 5:11-14, “Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. For it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret. But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, for anything that becomes visible is light. Therefore it says, ‘Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.’”
Today, I can tell you my friend has been vindicated, but it has taken years. She has suffered much pain from the lack of support from her own family. After 25 years, she decided not to be silent. Even though the people closest to her decided not to “get on the island with her,” she persevered. Her dad was never charged but he still leads a life of “captivity” and she is “free.”
It has taken years for her to heal and step away from her “abuser.” Deciding that if God knew, that was enough. Her story is an amazing one of courage and faith in a Holy God. She has taught me so much. God took her to a place where she looked for support and understanding from humans that didn’t exist and it drove her into the arms of Jesus. She knew that God knew and saw all things. He taught her that all that matters is ”that God knows and sees.”
This is what she has taught me and what I know to be true. When God is all you have, God is all you need!
He is a sovereign, all-knowing God.
There is NOTHING He doesn’t see and NO heart HE doesn’t know. Psalm 44:21 tells us, “…he knows the secrets of the heart.”
When you decide to walk with Him, surrendering to Him, then HE can guide you in the most difficult circumstances and take you to a safe place. It doesn’t matter if there is any human support or understanding. It can be a place of seeing the supernatural when YOUR EYES are on GOD for everything…every little detail. It gives you the best view of seeing His holy hand.
So today I encourage you–if you are in a situation where no one really sees except a HOLY GOD, that is more than enough. God don’t like ugly, especially hidden, deceiving ugly. He can do more in a second than we or others can do in a lifetime. Continually go to HIM. Allow HIM to be your ALL in ALL. HE is the master of bringing what is hidden in darkness to light. He is LIGHT. In Him there is no darkness. (see 1 John 1:5).
Take great comfort today in Psalm 27:1. “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?”